Thursday, July 10, 2014
Big IQ...Yeah, Buddy
Oh, teenagers of America, you are special.
Lately, I keep running into the teens who like to tell me that they are smarter than average. When did this become a conversation starter? Am I the only one who is annoyed by this?
Dearest young people, did you know that the one thing that might make me think you aren't so bright is to tell me you are a near genius?
In fact, if you just click your heels, sprinkle some fairy dust and wish for it - just wish for it, so very hard - I may be able to figure out your general intelligence quotient for myself. Well, let me be clear; I will be able to figure out if you are an actual genius or not by the way you act, speak and understand what is said to you. My assessment may not agree with your own assessment of your intelligence - but let's risk it, shall we? Please note that I will not give extra credit points for soccer trophies, perfect attendance, science project participation ribbons, boy scout badges, or tantrums. I'll be looking for you to actually appear intelligent on your own. Let your merits speak for themselves.
If you can't hold it in, and you absolutely must make me aware of your superiority, don't be surprised if my cranium explodes and don't bill my heirs for your neurologically stained clothes to be dry cleaned. You were warned.
This new guideline will be initiated at the count of three....1...2...3.