While sitting in my car at the stoplight, a strange feeling came over me as I looked at the sky above and realized I was surrounded by thousands of birds perched on every available telephone wire. A tornado of feathers swirled overhead. What was going on? Tippi Hedren was nowhere to be seen, nor Alfred Hitchcock...I knew it must be: TUESDAY NEWSDAY.
Each day, as I indulge my news addiction, a few stories jump off the page and make me do a double take. To be fair, these gems didn't get enough discussion for me, so let's look at them again.
Apparently, today's theme is crime and the young.
- Are criminals getting smarter - or are corrections officers just getting duller? I ask this because one of the county's finest released a 22-year-old felon who was posing as a 62-year-old inmate. With a dash of incarcerated inspiration, the young criminal upstart pasted his picture on the older inmate's identification card and called his gal pal and told her to arrange bail. She called the bail bond company and asked for them to make bail for the older inmate, who was in the mini-slammer for a minor misdemeanor charge. Young gangsta then filled out all the paperwork under the older inmate's name. Bail paid, off he went in to the wilds...for about five hours, after which, he was caught. It was the second time he had attempted an escape that month. [As you wander about, focus on the 62-year-olds and 22-year-olds you meet. Would you confuse the two? Wasn't that the corrections officers main job skill - to keep them in jail?]
- Once again, animal love wins out over common sense, when a 24-year-old Californian woman decided to climb into the giraffe exhibit at the zoo in Madison, Wisconsin. Noting that something wasn't quite right, an observant 2-year-old, 12 foot giraffe named Wally investigated and gave the lady a lick. I want to say that Wally wanted to neck, but I have too much pride. After the introductory lick, Wally promptly turned around and kicked her in the face. Zoo officials said she was lucky; giraffes have been known to kill lions. Doesn't this sound a bit like another story on this blog: Big Kitty Wants a Cookie? Is there a public service announcement in our future that will explain why zoo animals are in enclosures? Some people don't understand the concept.
- In Seattle, a 21-year-old girl called 911 to report a 20-year-old guy was following her. The police followed up and determined that the guy was following the girl because she had stolen his cell phone. She was arrested.
- Rikers' prisoners rioted last week when their bedtime (lights out) was changed from 11:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. Some commentators suggested they were angry that they didn't get to watch their favorite show on television. What is this, a prison?