Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Traveling and a Blast From the Past


[This is a repeat of a post from March of 2014. Still on the road!]

No, no, no!  This is the kind of trend that really gets my attention - in a bad way. Did I just see rapper Nelly on a Honey Nut Cheerios commercial?  It hurts my eyes!  It burns, it burns!  It's all Nelly's fault that I'm on this particular rant.

Cornell Iral Haynes, Jr., better known by his stage name, Nelly, has claimed fame as an American rapper, singer, songwriter, entrepreneur, investor and even as an actor.  Sure seems like he has a solid career. So, why for the love of M.C. Hammer did anyone let him appear on a cereal commercial with his "homebee?" The Honey Nut Cheerios' sugar buzzin' honey bee should assume an air of embarrassment, too - it's only fair.  Doesn't this guy have an agent?

I personally haven't felt so embarrassed for the rap community since they started calling their boyfriends and girlfriends "my boo," slipped the word "Yo!" into every stinking conversation and added a dash of "holla". Don't defend this as just urban culture, pay attention here. Heck, I've apologized for "cool beans" a million times. Recognize.

Rap is invading breakfast, people.  Word.

Breakfast is for plain, old boring people.  What am I to expect next?   

Let me confess my innermost first-meal fears:

  • Puff Daddy Poptarts - Courvoisier flavor
  • The Notorious P.I.G. Sausage
  • Jay Z O J
  • Kanye Western Omelets
  • Eggs Easy E
  • Snoop Oaty Oats
  • Cheeri-Yos
  • Lil Waynffles

All of a sudden, I'm worried about the whole East Coast/West Coast rivalry - first thing in the morning.  Which rap breakfast items can be eaten together?  Do I need more than one plate to keep the peace?  Can I eat these rap breakfast items even if I don't live in a 'hood?

It's all about the Benjamins with these guys.   I'm back to "just coffee, please."   

[2015 Postscript: My sons are saying, "Holla is so last year."]

10 comments:

  1. Good morning, dear Cherdo!

    This post is a genuine cereal killer. You originally published this piece in March 2014. You might wanna chex because, by this time, there's a good chance that some ad agency weasel has stolen your ideas and one or more of your bogus breakfast cereals might actually be on store shelves.

    This baby boomer is thankful that Mad Men have, for the most part, stopped using hit songs of the 60s as commercial jingles and are mining the music of more recent decades.

    I hope all is going well in your travels, dearie. Have a wonderful Wednesday!

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  2. Rappers, keep your hands off my corn flakes!

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  3. Was that the "HEY, must be the hon-AYYYYY" Cheerios commercial? It bugged me mostly because that song would get stuck in my head for hours.

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  4. They better not do away with Tony the Tiger. If I hear they put a hit on him I will be very upset. The last thing I need to see is some rap dude staring at me from a cereal box.

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  5. Too funny!! I do have to admit I am a fan of Usher and he was on the honey nut cheerios commercial.
    Hope youre enjoying your vacation.

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  6. Nelly is from St. Louis but did not come back to Ferguson to protest. He might be smarter than you think.

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  7. I have absolutely no idea who Nelly is, and I'm glad.

    Love,
    Janie

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Thanks for your personal yada, yada, yada,
Love, Cherdo