Monday, June 29, 2015

More Random, More Weird


It's time for a few random unrelated thoughts. Bear with me...

For the past few days, I volunteered at a conference. Hubzam, that giant of a man, took advantage of some vacation time to help, too. Gonzo got pulled into the mix, too. There was a hefty dose of reality involved.

The first morning of volunteering, I was standing in the closet when the thought occurred to me that the only thing I think about when I get dressed is comfort. When did this happen, I wondered?

Follow the de-evolution of my wardrobe:
  • When I was in my 20s, I really cared about what I wore. Jewelry, shoes, perfume...required. I cared about what others thought and I wanted to make a good impression. After all, I wanted to look my best - you never know who is watching, right?
  • In my 30s, I still cared, but it was compartmentalized. Jewelry, shoes...perfume gave me a rash. I knew that presentation was important and when it was important. I dressed selectively. My outfit was really important when I went out, and pretty important when I worked, but a crap-shoot at home. After all, I had children and I was a working mom. You never know who is watching, but I had decent curtains and confidence that no one was looking in the windows. Good enough.
  • In my 40s, my standard went from "look good" to "look presentable." Jewelry was for going out. Shoes had to be comfortable. Soap was my scent; I liked to be clean and that was close enough to cologne - I used nice soap. Late in that decade, a uniform was developing. Workdays were a thing of the past; all my work was at home. You never know who is watching, but the person that is watching should be aware of the fact that I think he or she is weird for watching. I'm old, man.
  • In my 50s: full on uniform! I'm proud of the fact that I am always clean. My uniform is short sleeves, V-necks and capris. My favorite shoes are "supportive" of my arches that fell long ago on some hard nursing floor. I hang on to old shirts just in case I'm doing something messy. Then, one day, I'll be going somewhere and think that old shirt is good enough and wear it out. I have an "oh, well..." wardrobe. If I was worried about what people think before, I now know they don't think about me much at all. Cool! And by the way, call before you come over...just in case.
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Time magazine is a favorite at our house and this week's issue is called "The Answer Issue."  It contained a lovely article (page 31): "Why Parents Should Not Punish Kids with Public Shaming" written by Susanna Schrobsdorff.

The piece cited incidents where parents filmed a 13-year-old with her long hair cut off - as a punishment. Kids are made to hold up signs that say things like "I'm a liar" or "I embarrassed myself and my mother because she taught me better."

Has society sunk so low or are people so social media obsessed, that they think this "punishment" is okay? When did parenting, especially bad parenting, become YouTube fodder? Who are these idiots who WANT to post this demeaning stuff and who is in this sick audience? Do they Google "inappropriate punitive punishments?" Does the public actually fire up YouTube and search for just that kind of video entertainment?

On the other hand, would you search Time magazine for information about appropriate parenting?

What ever happened to common sense?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay, this rant o' random is almost done...just a few more things:
  • So many people commented on the post about Pinky Bandanna that I want to make another Pinky Bandanna. Sort of a doppelganger fashion-fail statement. I may ask Mom...
  • My dog has the most amazing bladder. She can go 12 hours without a bathroom break. That's awesome on the rare days I can't get back home on time. Coco, I salute you.
  • Why doesn't someone come up with a "shop and stock" business. When you're really busy, you can't wait to get back home. Upon reaching that destination, you realize there's no groceries in the house and everyone wants to know what's for supper. Back out the door! I'd hire someone to shop and stock the fridge so I didn't have to do that, if there was such a thing.
  • Everything aches the morning after moving around boxes. At the time I was doing it, it seemed fine.
  • Hubzam is a workhorse. I'm glad he is on my team. He may not be glad, but I am.
  • Gonzo will do anything I ask and not complain. Watching kids out in public this weekend made me realize how rare that is...
Tomorrow, my brain will be rested and normal. Shutting up now (hey, you - stop that clapping!).



28 comments:

  1. Good morning, dear Cherdo!

    It is I/me, Shecky Shady Shaft, Jed I. Knight in a pink bandanna, the Yoda of yada, yada, yada.

    Welcome home! As I told you on my blog last night I am on the road, living out of a suitcase and using a borrowed laptop for several days and will not be back to my normal schedule until Thursday. Please bear with me especially on BOTB Wednesday when I will be traveling back to my new home again.

    You wrote:

    << My favorite shoes are "supportive" of my arches that fell long ago on some hard nursing floor. >>

    This popped out at me. I never knew how much walking nurses do during the course of a shift until Mrs. Shady became one. She is always telling me about the numerous treks she must take from one end of the hospital to another. She has incredible stamina. When we walk down the street together, through a mall or an airport, she walks at such a brisk pace that I can't keep up with her, even though I am nearly a foot taller, "all legs" as she puts it. She walks fast out of habit because she is required to do it every day at work in order to complete her rounds on patients. I take my hat off to her and to you for your years of service to the medical profession.

    I don't know what to add about parents who disgrace their children on social media. It's sad and it's sick and it is the opposite of good parenting. Shaming kids in front of family, friends and strangers, making them feel small and turning them into objects of ridicule all amount to bullying and will likely cause them to become bullies, too.

    Are you absolutely sure that Coco went 12 hours w/o a bathroom break? Did you look under the bed? Under the sofa cushions? If you look long and hard enough you are bound to find that yellow stain!

    Happy Monday, dear friend Cherdo!

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    1. In honor of my return and your escape, I've written a little song (sung to the tune of Willy Nelson's "On the Road Again")

      On the road again
      Looking for a public commode again
      The life I love is somewhere back with all my friends
      And I can't wait to get off the road again

      I'm sure you're on a fun jaunt, you little whipper snapper.

      Walking the floors will kill your feet unless you keep those tootsies in good shoes. When I was divorced, that was one of the ways I cut back on expenses - it was a huge mistake and one you can't "fix" later.

      Last but not least: Coco is smart but also too lazy to look under a couch cushion and think, "Oh, look! I found a bathroom spot!" Her secret to longevity is almost like a little dose of dog depression; if we're gone, she plants herself in the chair and doesn't move till we return. Fortunately, we don't leave her for a long period of time often and rarely on purpose for that long.

      Under the bed? You know of a dog who will pee under a bed? That is one flat doggle.

      Safe travels, king of the shady road!

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    2. I walked really fast when I worked in healthcare. Now I stroll.

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  2. A few years ago I posted a comment on parents publicly shaming a child. I'm against it.

    http://evil-pop-tart.blogspot.com/2011/10/boy-being-punished.html

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    1. That is crazy. If they were ever worried about how their son would "turn out" that big, fat label they gave him will pave the way. I'll bet he was haunted by that for years.

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  3. HI, Cherdo,

    Nice parenting.... How aweful. How much respect will these kids have for their parents? Not much, I assure you.

    Loved your "dressing through the decades..." So true. We often start out in life always worrying about what we wear and say...

    Cleanliness is most important. As long as you are clean, that IS presentable....

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    1. Michael, I knew you'd side with me on this one, ha ha ha. Sometimes, I'll hear "you shouldn't wash your hair every day..." Well, I'm sorry. I'm addicted to clean from head to toe. It's the only thing I've got going for me, tee hee.

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  4. I've never cared much what I wore, standard affair works for me. Even if its a bit wrinkly lol

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    1. Permanent press! Aha! There's another "high standard" I can attest to - I will take them out of the dryer when appropriately fluffed and hang them up.

      You've saved my rep, Pat, and given me something to add to my "clean" standard.

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  5. I've nominated you for an award on my blog.

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    1. You did? I've got to go check that out! Thank you!

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  6. I still want to look good in public but sometimes that involves a t-shirt and jeans.
    They do have a shop service but I don't think they stock for you. Actually, if they could come prepare the meal and clean up afterwards, I'd be interested.

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    1. You're on to "the next big thing." Oh, wait a minute...they have maids and butlers that do that. Maybe I just need a situational butler.

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  7. Reading your fashion devolution was entertaining/interesting. I've never been overly fond of jewelry. I really wanted pierced ears in junior high school and was so happy when I finally got them. Turns out I'm allergic to metals. I could give you the details of how that went down, but suffice to say that I tried everything to keep my pierced ears, including wearing gold hoops (with limited metal touching the ear) and NO GO. All of the skin kept falling off on my ears. Okay, that was TMI. So, no earrings. After that, watches, necklaces, bracelets, rings... nothing could touch my skin for any length of time or RASH. By the time I reached my 30s (and went nearly a decade wearing no jewelry) I discovered I could tolerate it in short bursts with no consequences. I can wear platinum all day long (of course).

    Perfume. I'm allergic to so many perfumes. I can't even walk through that section of the department store where the spritzer girls hang out just waiting to zap you with their sweet smelling poison. I've found a few scents I can wear. But, most of the time I don't...

    I haven't worked in an office since my 20s. I still have a few dresses and suits from those days (yeah, a bit outdated I'm sure, but it hardly matters since I can't fit into them anyway). Khakis and nice shirts became my work apparel in my 30s. Now, I live in jeans and T-shirts. Just finding something for church each week is a challenge. I only like to buy "nice" clothes when I'm on the skinny side. Right now I'm the heaviest I've ever been. Yikes. So, I think my wardrobe and yours could be related.

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  8. A "shop and stock" business would be a good idea. I'd hire someone to do that for me. If I had the money. Haha.

    Oh yes, I can relate to you on those aching muscles after moving. I moved just before A to Z. Had to make multiple car trips and a trip with a U-Haul. I was aching for weeks!

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  9. Shaming a child is terrible. My parents humiliated me many times, not by making me hold up a sign or something, but by telling gatherings of people private things about me. You might recall Fred Phelps of Westboro "Church" who died last year. He shamed two of his boys by shaving their heads. We were in junior high. Boys didn't shave their heads then. You could have heard a pin drop when those boys walked into the cafeteria. Everyone felt so bad for them. They always looked miserable, with their heads hanging, sitting together, never talking to anyone else.

    Love,
    Janie

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  10. I'm not sure about the concept of shaming people as a punishment. It often seems like there are no consequences for bad behavior, and I know some people who should be ashamed of what they do. But I don't think this should be used as a source of entertainment.

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  11. I'm totally against parents doing the public shaming. It's nonsense.
    My wardrobe hasn't changed much, though I do love comfy shoes!

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  12. Can I say I lurve you mind !
    Great rant. So much great information.
    My clothes are quite a bit like yours, except with the lovely addition of a big silver walker !
    My rants are usually political and I try not to do that more than once a year. Especially when a bone headed east cost liberal tells me, who lives in a border city what I should not be doing or care about.
    Opps sorry my rant..... my bad wrong blog.
    Watson has a iron bladder, I can't believe it. Thank Goodness I have a bathroom next to my studio.
    I have a tiny bladder.
    Love Pinky Bandana idea.

    cheers, parsnip

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  13. Flight one: I was a security guard once upon a time. Anything approaching a uniform triggers PTGD now.

    Flight two: Not really sure that involving the general public in punishment doesn't violate Colossians 3:21.

    Flight Three: Scrappy's bladder prowess is similar, but deteriorates rapidly with the presence of comfortable people in the room.

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  14. To think that there was a time in my 20s and 30s that I almost always had a suit on at work... 12 years in the inter-mountain west cured me of that! And our dog can also go long times without a break and on other occasions, well, I won't step there...

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  15. >>... On the other hand, would you search Time magazine for information about appropriate parenting?

    Or for information about anything else?

    No, thanks. I'll just make it all up as I go along.

    Woo-Hoo! 'The Return Of Pinky Bandanna'.
    (Muddy just whispered in my ear that he still demands top billing if a children's book is somewhere down the road.)

    ~ D-FensDogG
    'Loyal American Underground'

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. POSTSCRIPT:
      I really LIKE the graffiti on the wall. Very clever!

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  16. I think my wardrobe is very slowly going in the opposite direction. In my early teens I refused to wear anything but a t-shirt and shorts. For the rest of my teens I upgraded from shorts to jeans. Sometime in that period I bought a single button-up shirt out of necessity. Recently I decided I should get two more. And a short while later I expressed a desire for my jeans to not be so baggy. My mum is getting excited :P

    I gave you an award on my blog :)

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  17. "Everything aches the morning..." Enough said.

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  18. OMG you made me laugh and nod in agreement while reading this. I recall having high heels and funky outfits. I would make sure I put my make up on whenever I went out. When I hot my 30's I still would dress but I wore less high heels and more good shoes. Sometimes I would just put a little lipstick on and go. In my 40's I would look at my closet knowing I had to dress for work and wonder why. I wear make up but now less short skirts and more pants or capris. Now I am in my early 50's-I have not worn high heels in 2 years. I still must dress and wear make up for work but as soon as I come home, the bra is gonzo and I get into my uniform which is usually made of sweats material and very comfy. If I don't have to wear make-up, I am so happy that I gave my face a break. As for the shaming of kids-how cruel is that! I agree-common-sense folks!! Instead of shaming your children, you should have shown discipline at a very early age. When you say "No" stick with it. If they did something bad don't keep yelling for a half hour but discipline by taking something away. I am one who actually believes in a good ole spanking. Not with a belt and never bare bottom but a spanking on the bum is sometimes necessary. I don't consider it beating...just my view

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Thanks for your personal yada, yada, yada,
Love, Cherdo