Thursday, June 25, 2015

Throw Up..Er, Throwback Thursday: The Temple of the Pink Bandanna


Once upon a time, I used to travel a lot more than I do now. Cruises were my favorite. In later years, my Mom would start to travel extensively and she told me that it began with her living vicariously through me. That cracks me up.

The night before I was leaving on a cruise to the Western Caribbean and Mexico, I visited my Mom because she had announced excitedly that she made me a present for the cruise. In fact, she made several just to sure that I got the color I wanted. Proudly, she held out her handiwork. 

I froze. There was a moment in time when I wondered if she was kidding as my peepers gazed upon the worst of the worst: crafty fashion. She had made three bandannas; each one was "fringed." On each strip of fringe, she had added plastic beads. To me, this atrocity was quite possible the tackiest thing I'd ever seen and you wouldn't want to lay odds on whether or not you'd ever see me wear it.

My gaze went back to my Mom's face; dear Lord, she was serious. Mind your manners, Cherdo; I acted thrilled. 

The next day, I showed my buddy Jack and he laughed and laughed. Dang it. In spite of all that, I took it with me. On the first day of the cruise, I told my buddy, BH, about the bandanna and she shared my horror but we made a concerted effort to shake it off. We decided we'd get the bandanna in as many pictures as possible. 

The pink monstrosity found it's way into the shower...the deck chair...draped over the arm of a waiter delivering a drink. It was the place mat at a meal. A showgirl let me tie it on their feathered headdress.  We started calling it Pinky Bandanna and reminded each other: "Hey...who has Pinky? Don't forget Pinky!"

We took Pinky on a shore excursion to Playa del Carmen. About twenty children were at the pier selling "Chiclets." Not one of them would take the scarf as a gift. We offered to pay them AND give them the scarf - they said no. If it came to light that they reported us as American weirdos bugging kids, I wouldn't be surprised. My picture might be on the Yucat√°n's most wanted list. Not that we did anything that bad; I'm basing that at the horrified look they gave us when we offered Pinky as a gift.

Walking back to the ship, I still had Pinky and about a hundred Chiclets. For the record, Chiclets are as difficult to give away as pink beaded bandannas.

The bandanna went with us to ancient ruins and we actually tried to put it on an iguana. The number of humans that were willing to put it on was a solid "one."  BH's husband, Joe, actually donned the craft fail and pretended he thought it represented the height of fashion.

Joe takes one for the team.
By day five, the bandanna had kind of grew on us. Imagine sharing a pet that went with you everywhere. 

On the last day, I went to the back of the ship and tied it on the rope right under the cruise line flag. My brilliant plan involved a picture of our gang with our new official mascot, Pinky Bandanna. My knotting skills were sub-par and a brisk breeze sent it off into the Caribbean. Immediately, we all ran to the railing and gave a collective, "Awwwww! Piiiinnnkkky!"

She was gone.

Every time I see an article about sea life migrations in the Caribbean, I look at the spot where the creatures WON'T go. I think Pinky is there - scaring fish.

61 comments:

  1. Good morning, dear Cherdo!

    I can't help thinking that somewhere a vampire squid is turning heads (and stomachs) at this very moment. Until the shocking revelation that Pinky Bandanna was lost at sea, I was ready, willing and able to step up to the plate, offer to take her off your hands (neck and shoulders) and raise her as my own. True, she had a design only a mother could love, but I already had dreams of giving her a fulfilled life and a job, gainfully employed as the official drop cloth in my parakeet cage. I feel sheepish admitting this to you and potentially thousands of other readers, but I feel strangely aroused looking at that picture of Joe, so much so that I was compelled to use the image as my desktop background.

    Happy Thursday, dear friend Cherdo!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Joe would be so pleased.

      If only I had known that there was a kind soul who could look beyond Pinky's obvious fashion deformities and see the potential.

      So many bandannas are out there, still looking for that one person who could love them and give them a forever home. They come in all colors and beadings, all uniquely un-unique and yearning for recognition and acceptance.

      Or...you could sponsor one for pennies a month.

      Thanks for taking time to throw back the throw back. You're a giant among commentors.

      Have a great Thursday, Shady "Sally Struthers Del Knight!

      Delete
    2. I found a charity called Ugly Bandannas Without Partners. You can sponsor one for pennies a month and they even send you a picture of the bandanna you're helping. I declined the photo.

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    3. Shady, your final comment is priceless.

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  2. That's hilarious! Hey, you had fun with it. Maybe somewhere there is a sea turtle now sporting Pinky.

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    1. ...or shell shocked...it could go either way.

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  3. Pinky, buried at sea... perhaps turning the fish green with envy?

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    1. It all depends on the fish. Dolphin fish are not at all threatened by Pinky's personal style.

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  4. Maybe pinky and the lochness monster are off enjoying each others company

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    1. Well, it's possible. I've always believed that the Loch Ness monster stayed hidden because he didn't have a thing to wear.

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  5. Poor mom. She tried so hard. You can tell that she put some work into fringing the edges and adding the beads. That's just a shame when a craft goes so horribly wrong.

    Good on Joe for taking one for the team (and actually giving us a visual of ole Pinky).

    I kinda had a feeling she was going to end up in the ocean as soon as you mentioned tying her to a pole of any sort outside. I can actually imagine the collective moan as Pinky was whisked away and out to sea. At least it was an honorable death.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. [A moment of silence.]

      In general, the only things I would wear with beads would be a necklace and I've had a lifetime to prove that to my mother. Yet, I suspect, she'd still make another one (you know she never reads my blog).

      Delete
    2. If you look at the ancient ruins, Pinky is sticking out of the "hole" in the pillar, too.

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  6. Oh, I also posted a HERE'S TO YOU I think you'll enjoy:)

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    1. Ha ha ha...Marshall, you're at it again...

      (Thanks, Robin!)

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  7. Oh my gosh!! I had a blue bandana that was Pinky's brother!!! Literally with beads and all. No I didn't wear it, yes it too was a gift. I think I donated mine to a thrift store. I so wish I had more fun with mine like you did with Pinky though. Moment of silence for Pinky and Blue thing. (bows head).

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    1. This is hilarious to me...we have so many things that are common. The other part of that is the fact that I called for a moment of silence in the comment to Robin and then saw that you had done the same thing. Perfect. We're in sync.

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  8. Ah, it's not so bad ... OK, I'm lying. It's a nightmare in fringe. Beware of eating fish - you'll fillet the fresh caught fish and find PINKY come back from the grave to haunt you!!

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    1. I was worried for a minute, ha ha.

      Hey, this is serious, fish lovers - you can choke on a bead! You were warned.

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  9. That's a wonderful story. I'm sorry Pinky met an untimely ending to be buried at sea.

    In a way, it was very apropos for Mexico!

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    1. If you would have seen me begging the five year old to accept my gift of Pinky, you'd howl...

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  10. It's terrible that pinky's new tradition of traveling the world was struck down just as it was gaining momentum.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ...much like Amelia Earhart, only tacky.

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  11. That's hilarious! You should write a series about Pinky's adventures around the world - like Flat Stanley.

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    1. I got it! The Sisterhood of the Traveling Bandanna!

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  12. What a wonderful story! I'm impressed with how creative your photos were! Your mom must have loved them. It's funny how Shady offered to use your friend's photo as a screen saver. Great ending!

    Julie

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    1. I think he should use Joe as the screen saver forever.

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  13. This is so great.
    One trip to the UK and Italy I had this great red jacket. I would "Where's Waldo" everywhere.
    The kids had a great time looking for me.
    I wish we had then the great phones we have today to send to them instead of having to wait for the photos.

    cheers, parsnip

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    Replies
    1. Digital photography is the best invention EVER!

      A human "Where's Waldo?" is hilarious.

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  14. WILSON! I mean PINKY! Pinky wasn't all that unattractive. I would wear Pinky--under a coat or a heavy sweater. Franklin would wear Pinky and wouldn't utter a single complaint. You've made me laugh again.

    Love,
    Janie

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    1. Franklin is a real man; his masculinity is not threatened.

      I'd wear Pinky under a blanket, if I was sleeping solo.

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  15. I'd like to see you trying to put a pink bandana on an iguana.

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    1. Because you think the iguana would be okay with a different color, such as yellow?

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    2. Everyone knows you don't put yellow on the iguana...it's on the color wheel instructions for lizards.

      Stephen - note I said "try." That thing can really whip that big tale around (which scared me).

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  16. I have to assume it is safe to speak freely. I saw the picture, and said, "Good God! It's worse than she described!"

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    1. HA HA HA HA HA HA....that made me laugh out loud.

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  17. I kept thinking Pinky Tuscadero-hahahaaa Oh my and your mom was so proud. I bet you would still have it if it did not find a way to escape and be free. Somewhere in the ocean a shark is trying it on thinking he looks like the bees knees

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    1. Pinky was always a free spirit...I can only hope that she was picked up by a freighter and started a new life in some distant land...

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  18. Joe is obviously one cool dude! You were a doll not to hurt mom's feelings. And Pinky led you into many great adventures. Do you ever wish you had Pinky back, as a memento? Mama used to wake me every single morning singing, "Wake up little school girl!" By the time I hit my teens, I hated it. But now, all these long years later, it is a cherished memory.

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    1. My grandma used to sing, "Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer, do..." She'd never complete the song. I'd give anything to hear that once more.

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  19. I'll begin by saying... "I love PINKY BANDANNA!"

    Just the name "Pinky" alone reminds me of Gene Kelly (my very favorite character) in the movie 'WHAT A WAY TO GO!'

    Plus, despite the fact I have a reputation as "a man's man", I LOVE the color pink. It's my third favorite after green and blue. (Pink, Black, and White is an unbeatable combination). Also, I have enough confidence - yes, I am "A CONFIDENT HETEROSEXUAL" (please tell me you love that movie!) - that I would have gladly posed for pictures with Pinky Bandanna in multiple settings (but, "DON'T TOUCH ME THERE!", Pinky!)

    I have a stuffed dog named MUDDY (yes, after Muddy Waters). My Sister gave him to me in the very early 1980s because I fell in love with him in a Fox Hills Mall (L.A.) department store. Grown man traveling with a stuffed dog - I didn't care! You either accept me as I am - eccentricities and all - or leave me be. At first, some of my manly buddies found it odd, but eventually most of them accepted Muddy as our official mascot.

    Muddy (who is within my range of vision as I type these words) has TRULY seen more of the USA than most Americans have, because he has been my traveling pal on many, many road trips! When we'd go out to L.A. bars, my friend Dean used to ask, "Is Muddy coming?" And if I said no, he'd want to know the reason why!

    When I moved to Reno, guess who was sitting the entire time in the passenger seat of my U-Haul trailer.

    If anyone thinks I'm too odd, well... too bad... find a less authentic person to pal-around with then.

    I eventually wrote a full-length children's story about Muddy, and to this day, I honestly think it's the fourth best children's story ever written, after 'Winnie-The-Pooh', 'The House At Pooh Corner' (which is the greatest of all time!), and 'The Wind In The Willows'.

    However, Doc Cherdo, if you ever want to collaborate with me on a children's manuscript titled 'MUDDY AND PINKY BANDANNA', just let me know. (But Muddy gets top-billing no matter what!) :-)

    ~ Stephen

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    1. <<"DON'T TOUCH ME THERE!">> Oh, could it be a reference to The Tubes or just a coincidence?? My favorite group for purchased concert tickets to banned performances? Oh, could it possibly be true? I'm swooning.

      Authentic totally works for me; don't change. Doctor's orders.

      You'll need to have full possession of all your skills when we co-author "MUDDY AND PINK BANDANNA." Be forewarned: Muddy may have to don Pinky for photos or illustration purposes.

      Delete
    2. >>... "Oh, could it be a reference to The Tubes or just a coincidence??"

      NO COINCIDENCE AT ALL! Their "Live" album is one of the most entertaining of all time! Sheesh! (Did you possibly think the 'Crazy Train' engineer wouldn't be very familiar with The Tubes? I owned at least 3 of their albums, but the 'Live' one was easily the best!)

      >>... "Be forewarned: Muddy may have to don Pinky for photos or illustration purposes."

      Oh, hellck, he's already "appeared in pictures" with a whole lot worse than Pinky Bandanna! How that stuffed dog manages to hang onto his self-respect absolutely astounds me!

      ~ Stephen

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    3. POSTSCRIPT:
      True, I'm a WHITE PUNK, but I've never been ON DOPE.

      Which might actually make it more frightening when you consider that this is "ALL NATURAL". Hellck, that even scares me, Bullwinkle J. Moose, a little bit.

      ~ D-FensDogG

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  20. LOL the pink bandana sounds like a must have for every trip. Who knows? It could be the next lawn gnome and your husband is a real trooper

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    1. (Not husband - friend's hubby, ha ha).

      You know, someone somewhere laughed all the way to the bank about that lawn gnome. My Mom would have a heart attack if I asked her to make another one.

      Delete
  21. When I FIRST saw that picture, I thought this would be a "phallus something or other post."
    I believe I have a problem.

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    1. There is a distinct possibility that you have a problem...I'm not sure it has a name, ha ha. Flipside is relatively clean, Al!

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  22. You may find it hard to believe (okay, probably not), but I would have such fun with that thing.
    I STILL have problems, though.

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    1. I'm actually considering a re-created Pinky...

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  23. I wonder if Pinky is in our beached whale? I'll be looking out for her :-)

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    1. I'd turn that thing over and check it out. I wouldn't be the least bit surprised.

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  24. I got rid of a bunch of scarves and bandannas that I didn't wear. Some were gifts. None of them had beads, lol. You had fun with Pinky.

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    1. We can transform your scarves and bandannas to Pinky 2015 a la Sharif!

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  25. Pinky has led a more interesting life than I have, I think!

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  26. That's a touching story. I miss Pinky as well, ugly as he was.

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    1. I considered posting a coupon for tissues...I anticipated some weeping (smirk).

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  27. This is hilarious. My mom, God bless her, is also fashion deficient in this regard. But she's never made anything for me... yet.

    Pinky lived a good life. I know people that aren't even treated that well (including the whole burial at sea).

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    1. Come to think of it, Mom gave me the Pinky Bandanna and there were two others left. I never saw HER wear one...

      Delete

Thanks for your personal yada, yada, yada,
Love, Cherdo