It's weird, but even though I am a flipster (flip side o' 50), everyone I hang around with is much younger and they don't seem to realize that I am relatively ancient...or they're just nice (I do have some nice friends; I'm discerning).
You might know I'm in the plus-sized range from my rants on plus-sized clothing. I realize other people aren't, and that many older people jog and workout regularly. I'm not in that group though I tell myself I'll try harder.
I'll bet I've been invited to at least six 5K races (yes...as a participant, not an observer) for a variety of organizations, but mostly diseases such as breast cancer. In spite of my enthusiasm for supporting any cause, I don't think I can do a 5K, or any of the other consonants - with the exception, perhaps of P. I believe I could do a bang-up job of peeing for cancer.
Every time I excuse myself to use the restroom, from this day forward, I want you to remember that I am supporting cancer research, the development of effective treatments and the obliteration of the disease each and every time I pee.
[This is a re-post from 2014...still no 5K in sight.]
I did a 5K once. I walked most of the way.
ReplyDeleteRunning? I would run only if someone was chasing me ... with a weapon. And even then I would have to think about it.
I've got a knee made for disaster in a 5K...or a 1K...sometimes, Special K.
DeleteLast time I ran anything with a 5 in it was in high school '67, I think, miles. K's are shorter than miles, aren't they? Perhaps my inability to learn the metric system has deprived the world of a great athlete. I prefer to donate rather than run --which jiggles my innards.
ReplyDeleteReally, the only barrier to the Olympics was that pesky metric system.
Delete(Jiggles my innards...ha ha ha).
Peeing for cancer. Surprised someone hasn't thought of that it.
ReplyDeleteI run five miles at the gym four times a week. Yeah, I'll just slink away now...
I'll get you, Alex Cavanaugh...but I won't run after you.
DeleteA "Best of Cherdo" post? "Cherdo's Greatest Hits"? You must indeed be slammed this week. Is it okay if I leave one of my old comments from last year? :)
ReplyDeleteAs one of your beast friends, I cordially invite you to participate in my annual 5-SDK marathon. Join me, Shady Del Knight, as I pee in a bucket for 5 straight hours, a spectacle to raise awareness of the consequences of an excessively politically correct society. That's right. "We're putting the pee back in PC!"
Pee there or be square!
Happy Thursday, dear friend Cherdo!
I choose square.
DeleteI have no "best of" posts, just "Welp...here I am again...and you're here, too...hmmmm." I've got a stack of posts from when I started with NO comments at all. They need re-cycled. Besides, I didn't have a throw-back! I've packed up all the pictures.
DeleteYour bucket list is much more inventive. I wonder if more pee-ple would participate in bucket lists if they were given alternate methods of filling it. I believe you may be on to something here. I think, however, we are going to need lids for these buckets to make it all work out. Need is too strong a word...I think I'd feel more secure about the process if we did.
Urine my corner! (The square Janie chose fits there, too).
Will you get your friends to "sponsor" your peeing? :) I have occasionally had dreams of running a marathon, but the pages of the calendar keep flipping and my knees hurt more and more when I run...
ReplyDeleteI will! Shall I sign you up?
DeleteThe calendar is the exact same issue I have, sage...the flipping is hitting my knees, too.
Those races for a cause can be fun, if you're not one of the prime contenders.
ReplyDeleteI'm the cautionary tale of those races. :-)
DeleteI'm not a race participant either. My daughter and son in law on the other hand.... they enter many just for the heck of it, and collect the T shirt.
ReplyDeleteAt one time, I was a T-shirt collector for all sorts of things, but never the foot race.
DeleteOh my gosh yes!! I was just talking about this last night to a girlfriend ( the subject of P). The older I get the sooner I have to plan to be closer to the restroom. If I am holding it and I sneeze- its not pretty. I have the worlds smallest bladder as it is. I will be a sponsor of your PeeK for sure.
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome, we could start a HUGE Pee-K in Texas...cause everything is bigger in Texas.
DeleteExcept your bladder...I feel like Texas is cheating you some how, sister!
Peeing for Cancer. Well, that's a novel idea. I wonder if you could raise money doing that.
ReplyDeleteWell, we could sure try...
DeleteCherdo, your posts crack me up. Even now I'm picturing the tracking form for a Pee For Cancer fundraiser. I suggest drinking a ton of coffee on that day. That way you simply never leave the bathroom.
ReplyDeleteYou could have a coffee station right there in the bathroom or wear one of those beer can hats with the straw. That is what we can hand out instead of t-shirts!
Delete(P.S. Cracking up is fine. Life is waaay too serious.)
No one has ever asked me to participate in a 5K. People look at me and shake their heads. They ask Franklin all the time, though.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
No one should ever ask me to...but maybe they are optimists.
DeleteLady Cherdo ~ Peeing for cancer is admirable! I bet if you logged the distance, to the throne and back - in no time you'd hit a K or two (smile). Gosh darn ~ I'm older than you! You knew that, right?! Don't go there!
ReplyDeleteThere's only two ages: before 50 and after 50. Pre-flip and on the Flipside. It's a pretty wide berth.
DeleteI rationalize that humans aren't designed to run long distances. Ever seen a smiling runner? I haven't I prefer swimming. Nor so much stress on the joints and you don't swear as much.
ReplyDeleteI think you are logical and brilliant.
DeleteHah! Let's get a six pack and cure the crap!
ReplyDeleteOh, Chris, I can't drink a six pack of diet soda.
DeleteI was asked once if i would be in a marathon. After I stopped laughing, they realized this would never happen and knew better than to ask me ever in the future:) I am all for peeing for cancer.
ReplyDeleteWe almost have a team put together, Birgit! Queens of the Thrones!
DeleteDearest Cherdo, here in Canada, thankfully, obesity is not a big issue , strongly because of Participaction.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.participaction.com
I don't recommend doing a 5K, but a nice long walk in nature is great! It can be a half hour a day, or an hour a day, it need not be running, either. I know that the soft drinks with all the sugar they contain do not help, drinking water is the best. Swimming and Yoga or Tai-Chi are also good. 5K is for people who are experienced and have done this before, I don't recommend it for people who are not used to it. Besides, as for myself, I don't like running, but I love to walk, which is just as good, and you don't get as tired. :)